Stories of Resilience: Getting My Spark Back After Divorce

This blog contains the voice of a friend who has gone through a divorce. In this piece I think you will find wisdom, courage and hope, just like I did.

Here are a few of the most helpful things I did after my divorce to help me rebuild for the future. It's longer than I thought it would be, but there were so many helpful things along the way. It's amazing to reflect back on where I was at the time of the divorce compared to where I am now. I'm feeling proud!!

• Go back to something you used to love but lost time for (for me that was yoga) - it helps get your spark back.
• Work with a therapist / coach who will listen, validate and then get REAL with you. You must take this opportunity to work on yourself so you don't just recreate the same situation.
• My daily affirmation was: "I get to write my next chapter, what do I want it to feel like? As I went about my day, I'd reflect "Is this what I want the next chapter to feel like?"

Nikki M.

• Journal!!! Helpful prompts for me:
• What about the divorce make me mad, sad, and afraid? What am I looking forward to?
• What do I love to do? What did I used to love to do? What have I always wanted to learn?
• Is this how I feel or how I think I should feel?
• What's the worst that will happen if I take this step toward creating the life I want now?
• Trust your gut instinct and know it's ok to change your mind. Give yourself time and space to be able to feel your gut and know that your gut is always right.
• Let people in and let them support you - friends brought dinner, went for walk and talks, and brought plates to smash in my garage : )
• Have patience. Healing takes time. Nothing is forever. Get curious about what's unfolding in front of you and where your next step might take you.